THE TURIN SHROUD

No use investigating this one as it has now been proved once and for all to be one of Leonardo Da Vinci's sweaty beach towels, although Leonardo was actually Shakespeare which was a pseudonym of John Dee who was burnt on a stake made in Orleans in 1066 or something like that. Oh, and he also wrote the bible.

URI Geller astounded the world by appearing on TV shows bending spoons using the power of his mind.

The question remains, why did Uri first want to bend a spoon and why use this rather odd method to do it? I myself can bend twenty spoons just using my bare hands in the time it takes Mr. Geller to disfigure one - but then again I don't have several luxury mansions and a fleet of Rolls Royce's.

However should Uri ever find himself in a life threatening position with his only chance of survival to bend a teaspoon on a nearby table, Mr. Geller will escape with ease.

VAMPIRES

Creatures of the night that rely on fresh human blood to retain their undead status.

Vampires can be killed once and for all by driving a wooden stake through their heart. Come to think about it, driving a wooden stake through the heart of any animate object would have damn hazardous consequences

Famous vampires include Dracula, Christopher Lee and Margaret Thatcher.

By drinking large amounts of liquor alcoholic Serios amazed paranormal investigators world-wide by producing thoughtagraphs - photographs of far off places using his mind and a camera.

By repeating the experiment myself I managed to materialise half a dozen road cones and a blow up doll called Lollita in my bed, a splitting headache and no recollection of how the hell I managed it.

This subject definitely requires more investigation.

The great Siberian explosion in June 1908 has mystified researchers for years. It seems a mass atomic explosion similar to Hiroshima hit the area years before mortal man discovered such power.

Over the years UFO crashes and comets have been mentioned, as the cause although I still believe it was an undiscovered mine left by the dinosaurs and set off by a stray reindeer.